– During a strip search an inmate used his hands to make his butt cheeks say “excuse me sir, but do you have a breath mint?” – Trying to have a conversation with someone and deescalate them when you can hardly see them because so much feces has been spread over the window. – I saw a guy who slipped in the bathroom have his hip come completely out of his socket and his leg came out at a ridiculous angle. Almost every time an inmate is polite and seems like a decent enough person I end up hearing their case in the news and it is 9/10 sex charges. – I try not to look at their charges because I find it hard to treat them the same after I find out that they are a violent sex offender. Trying to contain that situation with nothing more than OC spray and Gloves was a pretty grim welcoming to corrections. – My first fight I responded to was a stabbing. All he said was “I saw a guy eat his shampoo because he couldn’t shower…then uncontrollably puke and shit himself…that’s how my day went.” He came one one day with a stone face so I asked him how work was. One of my old roommates worked in the county jail. I’ve tried to get him to write these stories down but he won’t do it because he doesn’t want anyone to get in trouble. He was head of the SORT team, so he has seen some shit. He won’t talk about a lot of things, like riots. He has walked in on many suicides and saved a few people trying to commit suicide. I’m pretty sure he shot and killed fleeing inmates but he won’t confirm it. He transported inmates back to Cuba where they were promptly walked around a corner and shot and killed after they were handed over. He was on a kill list from the Mexican mafia and my mom got threatening phone calls from people saying they were watching us kids at the bus stop. He was attacked with a pipe and almost died. There are a lot of stories that us kids didn’t find out until he was retired. My dad is retired from the Federal Bureau of Prisons, and started out in the California prison system. After they said goodbye to each other, a guard told my dad that the woman was sentenced for life because she killed her husband, and put the body through a meat grinder. He had a nice chat and a sandwich with an inmate.
My dad was installing a ventilation system at a women’s prison. My dad used to work as a CO and he would never tell me any stories about his time there until one day of constant badgering he told me the tale of the Easter surprise.Įaster morning one of the inmates thought it would be a brilliant idea to get completely naked and shove a toilet scrubber all the way up his ass so the only part visible was his bristled “bunny tail”, he then proceeded to scream that he was the Easter bunny while trying to hop around and avoid the oncoming guards The biggest deterrent for me breaking the law are stories like the ones below, stories from current and former prison guards talking about the most disturbing things they’ve ever witnessed…Contrary to the first story, these are not humorous, they’re pretty FUUUUUCKED up, so get ready to be disturbed ( via AskReddit): I don’t plan on getting locked up at any point in my life mostly and I have shows like HBO‘s Oz to thank for that, shows that scared the piss out of me and have left a lifelong lasting impression.
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